Thursday, December 19, 2024

I’m a survivor! – Irish Golfer Magazine

Must read

When Marie Chawke accompanied a friend to Endocrinology specialist Doctor Mary Ryan for a full medical health check, she did so in solidarity with a friend in need. It was August 2020. Covid was ripping through Ireland but Chawke felt fit and healthy, which made the discovery of a lump during a routine mammogram all the more surprising.

Assured it was nothing to worry about, Chawke attended a follow-up appointment and thought nothing of it until a number of missed calls appeared on her phone. It was initially determined that Chawke had a pre cancer – again, nothing to fear – but it was Professor Michael Kerin in Galway who suggested something more sinister could be at play.

More mammograms, ultrasounds and biopsies followed until Chawke’s worst fears were realised. It was cancer – Stage Three hormone aggressive but thanks to incredible advancements in breast cancer research, crucially, it was treatable.

“I was shocked for sure,” says Chawke, Director of Business Development at Dromoland Castle. “Once you hear the word cancer you’re going to be shocked.

“One bit of advice the doctor gave me was ‘when you come back tomorrow, bring another pair of ears with you’ because I’d happily attended alone to that point but it’s hard to take it all in. There were no tears. I talked to my husband, we wrote all of our questions down and we decided that we were going to deal with one thing at a time and stop looking down the road.

“I came up the next day for a full body CT scan and they realised it had spread to my lymph nodes but it was very treatable. From day one, Professor Kerin said ‘I’ve dealt with this, unfortunately too many times, but don’t worry, we’ve got it.”

“I trusted him immediately and decided we were going to be OK.”

Chawke was diagnosed on August 20th and started her first round of chemotherapy in the first week of September, with treatments taking place every fortnight right up to Christmas.

“Chemotherapy can be very scary and naturally you’re going to feel upset or frightened somewhere along the way but it’s so important to think positively, to surround yourself with a great network of people, and I was very fortunate to have that in spades with my husband, family and friends,” Chawke says, whose innate positivity proved a key asset in coping with each stage of her treatment, including the rapid hair loss that hit the high-flying hotelier after two rounds of chemo.

“I had a really good friend in New York, Bebhinn, who went through the same cancer and we both had big, voluminous hair which we both loved. She was a beacon of confidence and a huge support for me,” Chawke says.

“I remember going to Dylan Bradshaw in Dublin and he said the best thing I could do is cut my hair short. It was going to be hard to see it go from long to nothing so he said have it short for a few weeks and enjoy it short, and we went and picked out some wigs.

“As the weeks went on, my head started to get sore and tingly and I was feeling a bit scared as my hair started to fall out. My great friend in Killarney, Pat O’Neill, suggested he come over and shave it, thinking it might help the pain and discomfort and I was all for it then.

“I even FaceTimed my friends, Natalie in Charleston and Maggie in Dubai, as we shaved it and we made a joke about it, just tried to normalise it and if anything, there was relief once it was gone. We’d got to that step. Now it was time to get on with the next thing. Get on with getting better.”

Win a buggy with Play in Pink and The Buggyman

Chawke took great comfort from the outdoors, finding refuge in Killarney National Park and along the pier in Salthill between clinics where fresh air fuelled mind and body on her daily walks. It was an article in Life Magazine by Trina Cleary that inspired Chawke to use those daily walks to help others. Cleary had been diagnosed with the exact same hormone cancer as Marie and went through the same treatment.

“It struck a chord with me,” Chawke remembers. “Trina was very brave, and when I read her article I felt encouraged by how she’d come through it and it just felt totally normal.

“The piece was highlighting the need for private donations to the Irish Cancer Society as Covid restrictions meant the Daffodil Day bucket collection was cancelled, so I had the idea to do something too. I asked some friends and they said ‘go on, it will put your cancer out there and there’ll be no questions then, it’s all over with, and you’ll be doing it for a great cause as well’.”

Chawke took to Facebook to share her story, along with news of a GoFundMe that would see Chawke walk 10 kilometres to raise vital funds for the fight against cancer. She published the post, setting a lofty target of €4,000, and by the time she arrived at the Galway Clinic from the Salthill Hotel, the fundraiser was three quarters of the way there.

“It was incredibly exciting,” Chawke says. “When I came out of the treatment it was already at €4000! I said to my husband what am I going to do? He said ‘raise the bar’ and I said ‘no, they’ll think I have fierce notions!’ But he kept at me, ‘it’s for the charities’, so I put it up to €10,000 and next thing it became a thing in the local town about how far we could push it.

“The fundraiser gave all of us touched by cancer – our communities, families & friends a banner to rally around, and an easy way to donate.”

In total, Chawke raised over €50,000 to split between three charities with one sweet little boy, Harry, who had just made his Communion, insisting that his mother contribute €50 of his gifts to Marie’s magical walk.

It’s such generosity that makes the work of organisations like the National Breast Cancer Research Institute in Galway possible. The Lambe Institute has been at the forefront of life-saving advancements in diagnoses, treatments and patient outcomes and while Chawke was always aware of its vital work, her relationship with the charity has evolved through her own cancer journey.

A proud member of Killarney Golf Club, Chawke had taken part in Play in Pink Golf Days which raise essential funds for Breast Cancer Research but it was after joining the team at Dromoland Castle in 2017 that her interest in the vibrant charity really ramped up.

“Director at Dromoland, Mark Nolan’s wife Maria sits on the board with the Breast Cancer Research Institute and she hosted a Play in Pink tournament at Dromoland every year and it was a huge event,” Chawke explains.

“We hosted the finals at Dromoland in 2019 which was a massive success with clubs from all corners of the country competing. There was a gala banquet and it was a huge celebration with Professor Kerin speaking on the night. I was learning more and more about it year-on-year but after going through my own experience, I was never more invested.”

No wonder then that when a Charity Partner was proposed for the historic return of the KPMG Women’s Irish Open at Dromoland Castle in 2022, Chawke was quick to nominate Play in Pink.

“It just had to be,” she says. “It was so appropriate, and to see the support from players, caddies and spectators dressing in pink for the special Play in Pink Day was phenomenal.

“We are so proud of Dromoland’s involvement. It was a fantastic partnership and very overwhelming to see the support.”

Play in Pink’s standing in Irish golf continues to grow through its ongoing partnership with our Women’s National Open with over two hundred golf clubs following Dromoland Castle’s lead by hosting charity days in the name of Breast Cancer Research.

“I just hope every club embraces it because it’s such an important cause that touches so many lives,” Chawke says. “It showcases solidarity and compassion, and it’s a shining example of the wonderful golf community coming together to support so many people around the country.”

Chawke experienced first-hand the empowerment such support can bring and today she’s living cancer-free having completed her last surgery during a reconstruction operation in October 2021.

“I’m feeling great and my hair is back,” Chawke beams. “My husband jokes that he’s never seen me with so much energy. I would have a very positive mindset anyway but I travel a lot for work and I go to the States a lot and that’s helped my confidence.

“They’re so open talking about things over there and my story comes up in conversation. They ask me to talk about it and share it and it gives me the empowerment and the strength here in Ireland to be open with more people too.”

As for any ongoing treatment, Chawke takes Tamoxifen every day and goes twice a year for a Zometa infusion to help build calcium in the bones. She remains eternally grateful for the unwavering support she’s experienced inside the Irish health system and beyond, with special mention to Mark Nolan at Dromoland Castle for his relentless understanding and support.

One in seven Irish women are diagnosed with breast cancer every year. It’s a shocking statistic but Chawke is living proof that treatment plans are working and the disease can be defeated.

“I remember my aunt got cancer when I was a child and when you heard she had breast cancer it was you were going to London to say goodbye to auntie Eileen, and not wish her well and stay positive. It’s so different today, thankfully, because all of this research is having a monumental impact.”

The funds raised through Play in Pink perform a critical role in this research but that only tells part of the tale of this incredible flamingo fairway community; one that provides a safe space for people to share their stories, find strength in numbers, to educate each other, but more than anything, to realise beyond doubt that they’re not alone. Far from it.

“It is a movement,” Chawke says. “And we’re fighting it together.

“Of course everyone deals with their diagnosis differently and it is an incredibly difficult thing to go through from start to finish. I felt scared, overwhelmed, even isolated at times, but you’re definitely not alone.

“I have an amazing husband, Pat, an amazing sister, my Mum who since passed was always my rock. She was very practical, and I cherish the support, wisdom and love she gave me. But definitely reach out. There are so many people who care about you. That’s what I learned.

“Sometimes you might find it hard to open up to family and confiding in a friend could be easier. The cancer care nurses are also there and they know exactly how to answer your questions in the most diplomatic way.

“Above all else though, just focus on the steps ahead of you and stop looking down the road. And treat yourself along the way! After the first round of chemo, buy yourself a lipstick or flowers or something that makes you feel good because you deserve it.

“Take care of yourself, mind yourself, and know this time is just about you. That the medical interventions are world class, and that there’s a great community of support out there to help everyone get through this journey and all they want to do is offer love, hope and strength to you. That’s something I felt in abundance.”

For more information on Play in Pink visit www.PlayinPink.com and for details on the National Breast Cancer Research Institute visit www.BreastCancerResearch.ie 

Latest article